Week 6 Coaching Faheem

Faheem and I explored the art of marital conversation. His experience enacting suspenssion met with mixed reviews as we reflected on the results. He was having a conversation with his wife and made every effort to open himself up to her stnace on the subject (about their children) truly listening to what she had to say. In doing this, Faheem suppressed what he was feeling and did not say what he meant. We realized that in a sense he was coddling his wife, telling her what she wanted to hear and abandoning his true self in his shallow encouragement for her to continue with her talk. I challenged him to define the difference between suspension and politeness. Was he digressing into field 1? He believes that he was. The positives of suspension, we determined, are more fitted to the boardroom. In a marriage it is so difficult to have a dialogue with your spouse as you can not abandon your deep seeded emotions. He truly tried to see his wife's way of thinking but was driven into silence through the desire to avoid conflict.

Faheem has an amazing sense of who he is and how to engage in productive conversation. He is truly inspirational when it comes to his sense of self. He has connected with and understands the person that he is today and desires so much to reconnect with his wife as they struggle to redefine their marriage. I look forward to our next conversation as they continue their life journey.