Week 8 Mary Kate Coaching Me

I began our conversation as I reflected on my presencing activity. I sat on my back porch upon the weathered deck and took a deep breath. It was very very difficult for me to push aside all my thoughts that crowd my ever racing mind. I sat Indian style on the hard wood and closed my eyes. I focused on sensing. So, I focused on my five senses. I saw the light creeping behind my eyelids, not allowing me to force the sun from invading my serenity. I heard the birds as they began to migrate back to the northern hemisphere, the turn of a car into a driveway, a dog bark in the distance, and the wind whistle softly past my ear. I felt the sun warm my face and the wind tickle my skin reminding me that it was still winter. I tasted the remnants of my afternoon snack upon my tongue. I touched nature and the outdoors, the essence of life and the world I lived in. I told Mary Kate about this spiritual connection with the world. It truly helped to center me in that I am NOT the center of the world.



I saw myself as small. Once this thought entered my mind, I could not let go of it. I felt unimportant and inconsequential. In retrospect, I realize that I am important and a piece of the puzzle of life, but then I could not grasp that concept. I am part of a community of people working together to live happy lives. It is my chosen contribution to society to teach valuable life skills to the youths so that they may take their place in the cooperative ecoclimate of the human race. I have also chosen to perpetuate our culture through procreation and mate selection. I wish to have a family, be a community member, and do my best towards actively contributing to the social efficiency of the world.



For part two, I had a conversation with my brother. I asked a lot of questions and remained silent while I tried to truly listen to what he was saying. I attempted to define what his highest future possibility was and how I could assist him in becoming that individual. I tried... I really did... and I was successful at time but all too often when attempting dialogue with him I am sucked into downloading and regress to phase one. I adopt politeness, do not say what I mean, act and think based upon past precedence, and make judgements. The best part about this course and this exploration into self as a whole is recognizing these thought processes as they occur. My coach is always so supportive and admiring of my admitting to my lack of forward movement. As I have previously stated, I am not yet ready to progress to the upper levels of conversation and dialogue but I do have goals and knowledge. These are invaluable tools as I continue to explore myself.